Ninjas!
When I was a kid, Ninjas were awesome.
Forget Arnold and Rambo, the ninja took the cake. From karate kid to Bruce Lee to Steven Seagal, martial arts made you invincible. Many boys (including myself) took karate or tae kwon do or aikido in order to possess these most excellent skills. Ninjas were totally rad!
Today ninjas are still around, but they have fallen from their previous stature. They could still be described as totally rad, but the calling something totally rad today evokes a different emotion than it did 20 years ago.
The internet is full of totally rad ninjas!
Chuck Norris v. Bruce Lee - Totally Rad back in the day!
Chuck Norris today reading Chuck Norris Facts - Still Totally Rad
Ask a ninja - this is one of the more dangerous ninjas, he spends his time critiquing films.
You may wonder when the ninja fell from grace. This may have had something to do with it.
Wheelchair Ninjas
In honor of ninjas, I have placed a feed from the Chuck Norris facts page to my sidebar. Each day there will be a new Chuck Norris fact displayed.
Mama's Little Babies Hate Fake Milk, Fake Milk
-
A happy Wednesday to you! Today we tried the puppies on fake milk. It
didn't go over very well. I'm not looking forward to this process. Only one
of them l...
16 years ago
4 comments:
Well Jake, that's just great. You've gone and done it. You've blown holes in my Plan B. If all else failed I WAS going to be ninja. Now I have to move to Plan C... a showgirl.
Chuck Norris turns my stomach. If he doesn't turn your stomach then you must be died so let's arrange a funeral. See how I worked in a line from Joe vs. the Volcano? Pretty clever, huh?
You know what, I've had time to think about this and it's just bugging me. I don't feel like my 1st post adequately describes my feelings about Chucky "good ol' boy" Norris. Now that you opened the door I feel forced to go into detail...
First, Chuck Norris is cheap and tawdry flash used by Hollywood to novacate our brains. Bruce Lee or Ed Parker could kick his butt any day of the week and I wouldn't even feel bad about it.
Second, Chucky spent half of last year and this year campaigning with Satan's lap dog Huckabee Schmuckabee. I blame Huckabee for the reason McCain is the GOP nominee and why Obama will be our next president.
Thirdly, Uncle Millsy knows Chuck Norris from way back when. We asked Chuck to sign a b-day card for Grandma Ellen (she does like the Texas Ranger show) but he didn't even respond.
To sum this enchilada up, Chuck Norris is a stinking turd in a karate outfit with a bunch of show-off moves that really amount to nothing. I don't even know if he could take on a bunch of old ladies. He's a show piece, that is all. And his beard is weird and has been for the last 6 decades.
Could I go on, probably so. But I will try to end the Norris hate fest here. If I think of more things that bother me I may or may not feel inclined to post them.
P.S. I will never look at people in a wheelchair the same way again. It's nice to know if I were to loose my legs sometime in the future I still have options.
Okay, I thought of more. Chuck's tae kwon do is next to useless. It's an inferior form of karate to begin with but Chuck manages to make it even more useless.
The man has a carpet chest with fur on his freakin' shoulders! Didn't you do a mutant post recently? He could join Wendy the Whippet et al if you wanted.
Post a Comment